to be a bug one has to be a beetle first

now look at this, said bread, bloody hell. i woke up and the roll was gone, would you believe? should i call the priest or the therapist or the gp or the police, so many options for help i don’t know where people would get an idea of despair from. just a metamorphosis that’s all.

remember the first steps

after the motion ban, said sponge, our legs were stiff, we could hardly walk. he said thesewords like someone who is very sure of himself, someone who believes his message should be spread.
i think we had exactly the same episode before, said breadroll.
do you think so, said sponge, is it the message bit?
no, said breadroll, don’t know.

a first line for there is no better one

they did ask me, said breadroll to make the first line and that is exactly what i did — right now i did it. not that i did not do exactly the same thing before but that is a second line now which i believe everyone has been waiting for.
he loiters for a while.

first contact

i heard you were still waiting outside.
yes i am, the fat woman said, i just couldn’t be arsed.
that’s amazing, said block of wood, i feel the same way every now and then.

the first

the first day of a month is always, almost always, a pleasant or rather exciting event that brings to cheers all joes and does and irishmen, plainly uplifting that day, puss willow said, the count is reset, it starts anew. i personnally find it amazing how they manage every month to get the day right.
that’s 3.90 for the pint, said the waitress.
puss willow paid and left. he returned later during the day when he had fully learned that the pint had been immaculate — im-ma-cu-late pint.

first holiday

nothing we will do today, absolutely and entirely nothing, said breadroll.
can i not butter you a bit, said block of wood, just slightly?
no you can’t, said breadroll, there is no policy for that.
come on now lads, sponge said, we’ve got to be seriously leisure focused for the moment, sorry.

© the Book of Sponge and Others.