if you don’t know what to say say something

distinction rather than extinction, said sponge, is what our company is after. i’ve chosen those words carefully yet there are weaknesses in detail. he looked around the everexpanding room. breadroll sat on a chair that once had been near the middle of the room. why does this room have to grow bigger every minute, he said, i can’t here you. can we not have ideas of our own? in russia rooms used to expand, it happened once, but here?
ah well, said sponge, people don’t know that bit about russia, not many people.

train people are what

train people can be creepy, call themselves train staff or something organised. many encounter them without knowing who they are. they tend to inflict pain. they do. they want to.
they apologise for inconvenience caused.

what does rain mean to us

rain. more rain. so it goes.
not a satisfactory answer, said sponge, then again, the question was somehow cryptic. brekst does not really ask any questions.
yet it is his big entry, said breadroll, i came to ask a question. it is terrible. the train is late. statistically it is on time though. if two trains are due at 17.30 and one arrives at 17.25 and the other at 17.35 both are on time statistically.
that is how success is made, said sponge. they do apologise for any convenience caused.

what a day to make the effort

would never do it, said block of wood, wouldn’t do it. not a compromise, seems miserly, would. said block of wood. and stood there. i could have punched him, slapped him across the face, gouged his eyes, kicked his balls, slit his nose, pulled his ears, but of course that would have been his thing, wouldn’t it. along with odd pun. i’m sick of senses of humour.

apologies for that is what to say when attempting to apologise

what was that?
an apology, to apologise, apologies, i apologise. in general means apologize: defend, explain, clear away, or make excuses for by reasoning; “rationalise the child’s seemingly crazy behaviour but coming to the conclusion that it was just crazy behaviour”; “he rationalised his or hers”; but also: acknowledge faults or shortcomings or failings or blunders; “i apologised for being late”; “he apologised for the many lesser things in life”. that’s me, said sponge, any second now. but if we were to provide them with a detailed account of inconveniences caused, would they feel worse? the same? better?

philosophy of what

the working class, by and large, is persistent. we open their graves in a 100 years time and find the track suits without a sign of decay, we can put them straight back into the economy; that how persistent.
impressive. no wonder they capitalise that. breadroll waited.
what are we waiting for, he said.

british and what becomes of it

braddash braddash, said sponge.
that was about it, the highlight and climax of the day. breadroll did not do much, hardly anything, and neither did block of wood. all took a break. that did not ease the situation. herr brekst: zis doesn’t even call for a poem, does it. wohl, we could always burn a puppet. to express passion and anxiety.

what would we say to make it not look like a

good, said sponge. pfffnn. — don’t you miss those sounds?
i’m fed up with things, too, said breadroll. i could have been you know. —— literary glamour and all. a recognisable figure in the books. ———

what herr brekst said and what he did not say

did he say he would be late, said breadroll, i can’t remember.
but you were there, said block of wood, and i wasn’t.
where you not?
no.
i came to ask a question, herr brekst said and they all knew that spring had arrived but still neither knew the question.

call for what yes innovation

it came to them like the child to our madonna; they’ve been secretly fucking around with somebody but now could not tell the truth.
well it might have been a vanilla bun, said breadroll.
beside the point. it was there now. immobile. non-negotiable. the call for innovation. it better be a good one for a laugh.

and now what now they said

and now? what now, they said. quietness. all seemed confused, no moves. i thought we were guided, said breadroll, so why are we bored?

what else did we lose on the way

we pissed the viewers off didn’t we?
nnnnn-o, said sponge. he had put thought gehind his reply. i am not saying this to merely to calm you down, breadroll, if you don’y mind me calling you that —–
i would not wish people to know, said breadroll, ralf or maybe rolf is far less a commitment, normal is hormonal as they say.
and what now, said breadroll, ready to come up with the same question again.

what the unknown man is likely to think

soccer, said herr brekst, sucker. smørrebrøb err –brød. that’s what every other lad wants.
we were so very delighted to see herr brekst safe and sound albeit somewhat clinically depressed that we did not challenge him on his latest statement. what did he come for anyway?

what a shame

herr brekst, bruised, wanted a steak, which he subsequently bought in a shop. he wanted the steak rare, with onion rings and mash. kitchen staff explained that open food was not allowed. herr brekst, disgruntled, spilt coffee on today’s script.

so what will it be then

i did come to ask a question, herr brekst said. a question or two, to be correct, a query.
breadroll and block of wood sat with the deflated presenter. sponge was nowhere to be seen (bathroom? my first guess.). a scene of tranquility and peace (still in bed?).
the presenter had told the others about the burning questions he still has to ask in the name of his audience (who will be rewarded with a portable barbeque kit – one for each)(is he hiding somewhere?) but unfortunately today did not seem to be a success (alright, i give up, where is he?).
i pulled a nose hair, the full length of it, herr brekst said, but that is although a success not the reason why i am here.

what is a breadnut

q: you mentioned some word the reader might not readily understand; would you like to explain?
a: a subject indeed as hairy as the breadnuts you’ve mentioned earlier. we are in an ongoing precess, or process, as the more conservative amongst you might say, but we are actually precessing something here, some shitty old garbage and then we run to the kitchen hoping to find somebody desparate enough to listen to our story, actually if they don’t get away in time they are geting the full story starting when this lad there and then bus came, the full story, thn th keybrroad brks, whata- a shit day. just loockkkkatihs.

should we be curious what they come up with

says sponge: it won’t be much today. nothing has been scheduled and a lot has been forgotten abput; it all should have been planned and therefore there is not much today.

what’s cooking

my name is herr brekst and i came to speak to you, said herr brekst and exhaled noisily. he said he was fine when breadroll put the question to him. i’m fine, perfectly fine, he said (the words still resounding in our ears, although he had a thin voice, somewhat shifty).
needless enterprise, said sponge, who had been delegated for interprose, herr brekst will have to speak to the receptionist at once.
it is somehow of somewhat delicate nature, my business, not my general compositure, to say this much, said herr brekst before the story ended.

what is dada anyway in modern industrial relationships

what, said sponge, just what. what can you say, can.
breadroll, said breadroll.
yes, said sponge, but not on target. will have to review the data going forward, he backed out.

© the Book of Sponge and Others.